I do not change diapers anymore! For me this important milestone is not just a marker of my Teeny Girl’s independence, this is one milestone that she completed early! My sweet girl had a rough start and she overcame a lot. Her gross motor skills were delayed, due to torticollis and an injury to her shoulder when she was born. She did a lot of things later than everyone else and with the help of pediatric physical therapy, she is now fully caught up with her peers and even a little more advanced. Mommy is so proud of you sweet girl!
I’m writing this post to share my experience with the Go Diaper Free hybrid potty training method that is designed for children younger than 18 months. Click the link if you want to learn more, I am not in the mood to get sued for copyright infringement, and Andrea Olsen is a mom of many who put a lot of time into her work. So here we go.
How did I get started?
Miss Girl had been fighting me for months about diaper changes. I tried it all, stand up changes, restrained changes, 360 diapers (I love these!), and tabbed diapers too. No matter what toy I gave her, what song I sang, or what I did, she was not having it. And if you know my girl, she has no issue asserting her boundaries. I started putting her on the potty when she was 11 months old, after I saw requesting a new diaper by trying to change it herself. So every single morning she was put on the potty when she woke up. I was still working my corporate job whilst doing this. I would say that shortly after she mastered walking at 14 months old, that’s when she was really trying to assert her independence. I also noticed that she had been waking up dry every morning right about 13 months old. I wasn’t sure if we should jump into potty training just yet, but I continued to do part-time elimination communication. My homegirl Ms.Rachel & all her friends made the potty training episode and I saw that she wanted in. She began saying potty whenever she went into the bathroom and saw the toilet. Of course, I was not about to hold my girl back because I knew from my experience in early childhood education, Maria Montessori stated that 12-18 months was the peak window for teaching toileting skills. She was 16 months old when we started diaper free time and within a week she was diaper free during the day.
Signs of readiness
The only signs of readiness she had was that she hated diaper changes and was always in the bathroom trying to figure out what I was doing. As someone who potty trained many children for a living and saw the damage pull-ups do to potty training first hand, I knew I wanted to use a method that would be efficient, educational, and effective. So I used the EC wrap up with a potty training experience, taught by Andrea Olsen. I can fully agree with Mrs. Olsen on this one, the signs of readiness that they want you to look for at 2-3 years old are crap. If your child can walk, you are a consistent parent, and you believe in your child; you can ditch diapers before 18 months old.
The tools we used
Foolish of me to think my child would be content with a run of the mill potty, she prefers the toilet with a seat reducer, or potty seat unless it’s her travel potty that lives in the car. Below are the tools I used to potty train my daughter in about a week.
- Toddler underwear
- Pottette plus
- Super Potty Trainer
- Jool Baby foldable potty seat
- Ms. Rachel (the potty episode specifically)
- Enzymatic pet stain remover (works wonderful on all bodily fluid clean ups)
Do you see anything missing? There are no sticker charts, rewards, pull-ups or bribery involved. You are simply using natural consequences and positive reinforcement. In our home, using the potty is just something you do every single day, like bathing and brushing your teeth. It is not some special thing that requires a lot of fanfare. We simply potty, wash our hands, and go about our day. It is a normal, every day event that doesn’t need to be exaggerated. No pull-ups allowed, they hurt more than help, but that is a different story for a different day.
How we got started
The first thing I did following this EC wrap up with a potty training experience was diaper free time. For 3 days I did 2-3 hours in the evening with no diaper. I have LVP floors throughout my home, so a little pee doesn’t concern me. If you have carpet or carpeted areas in your home, use a non-carpeted area, go outside, or waterproof mats for your diaper free time. During this time, you are just going to watch their potty cues and their natural patterns of elimination. Once we did this and I was confident in catching her in time to get her to the potty, that’s when we went hard core and committed ourselves to being potty trained.
Days 1-3
The first 2.5 days we were diaper free on with a dress or long t-shirt. I kept a potty in whatever room we were in because during this part, you are going to air lift them to the potty whenever they start to go. Trust me, I did a lot of mopping and “pee goes in the potty” speeches. But this is new information for the little brain to process. Developmentally long-term memories begin to form at the 18 month mark, which is why this method is perfect for instilling a very healthy hygiene practice. I did NOT introduce hand washing at this phase, I didn’t want to overwhelm her, I just wanted her to go in the potty (call me what you want, but my kid is potty trained). Every time she started to go or show a cue, off to the potty. Even if she only got 3 drops of pee, in the potty, she was getting it in the potty. By the night of day 2, she was peeing in the potty on her own. Day 3 is where I saw that something clicked and she was able to identify what her body was doing, what she was feeling, and communicating that it belonged in the potty. Since she could stay dry at night and at nap time already, all I did was just take her to the potty before she laid down and when she woke up. At the end of day 3 I let her do 2-3 hours commando in pants. All it took was one accident in pants with no underwear for her to understand that she didn’t like the feeling and the potty was the better option.
Days 4 and 5
On the morning of day 4, we decided to put underwear on. I kept her in dresses and long shirts, still keeping a potty near by just in case we needed to move quickly. She had some resistance towards the potty on Day 4. I understand why, she was testing limits (which is on track developmentally) and she wanted more independence in the process. After a day of tears and frustration on both parts, I decided that on day 5, she would be in charge. She would tell me when she needed to go and I wouldn’t just take her or prompt her. I also started giving her privacy; meaning I would sit her in the bathroom and go do something else while she did her thing. It worked. Day 5 was the turning point for her. This was when she saw that she had some autonomy in this process and all we were doing was respecting her development all while working on a new skill. We went from 3-5 accidents in one day to about 2. She was getting really good at telling me when she had to go and we did our first outing, she did not have an accident and even used a public bathroom with full confidence. I was floored because my baby was truly a big girl.
Days 6 and 7
Days 6 and 7 went extremely well. By this point she was also pooping on the potty and having maybe 1 accident a day. Hand washing was introduced here. I wanted complete mastery of recognizing her body signals, getting to the potty with assistance or independently, and keeping her underwear clean. That is a lot of information to take in and learn in roughly 5 days. Once I saw that she was confident with that, I implemented hand washing. Now, since I was the one doing the wiping I was modeling hand washing by explaining what she needed to do before letting her do it. During this process, any time that she went with me to the bathroom I modeled proper hand washing. For my child, she needs to see everything step by step before she adds on another skill. Day 6 specifically was when she was initiating, going in the bathroom, doing her business, flushing, and washing her hands. Washing your hands involves a bunch of other steps that need to be practiced and processed. So she learned that you turn the water on, you pump the soap once, you make bubbles with the soap, you rinse the bubbles off, and dry off your hands. But she learned that while she was confide with using the potty on her own. Our goal is to be potty independent by 18 months old. I would say that we are off to a great start.
How I handle accidents at home
Unlike my family of origin’s methods of beating you for every little thing, I refused to hit, scream, or belittle her while she was learning. Trust me there were moments where I was frustrated with the process or myself, not her. Sometimes I would miss a cue or not hear her clearly. I mean lets be real when she says hot, box, sock, and pot it all can sound the same. In the event of an accident I would explain to her what she did wrong (ex. “You peed on the floor, pee goes in the potty”) then have her tell me the correct action (ex. “Teeny, where does pee go?”, she says “In the pot”). I never told her it was okay, because peeing on the floor or on yourself is not okay, using the potty is. But I did reassure her that I wasn’t mad at her and that she would get it next time. The we cleaned up her mess together and changed into dry clothes. I am like this every single time she has an accident because I want her to feel safe any time that something is wrong or she makes a mistake, and know that I will help her. She does not like having accidents at all because she knows it means: she has to clean up (I do help her), expectations are given, and she has to change her clothes. All of this takes more time than stopping and going to the potty. She is still learning and will sometimes make mistakes.
How I handle accidents in public
As of today, we have not had an accident in public. I know that this time may come and I will handle it the same way that I have been at home. She will be told what she did wrong, she will be given the correction, she will be given the expectation, we will clean up/change clothes and move on. I have a minimum of 3 changes of clothes in her bag and a diaper. The diaper is the absolute last resort, such as if she were to get food poisoning or a stomach virus. I do keep a travel potty and potty accessories in the car so we can be proactive.
I mentioned previously that we have a travel potty when lives in our car. We take this with us in the stroller when we go to the park, the beach the pool, or any place where the bathroom may not be close but she can easily be popped on the potty in the stroller and no one knows anything.
To wrap this up, if you want a successfully potty trained child who is confident in their capabilities, you must be consistent. You have to commit yourself to success (yours and theirs). Children are capable of far more than we give them credit for. Set your child up for success by allowing them to make mistakes, setting expectations with boundaries, and allowing their natural progression for learning. It is totally possible to potty train your child before 2 years old AND without pull ups.